What I Learned In Boating School Is....
Tomorrow is 2016! Here is what 2015 taught me.
1. All of your closest friends don’t have to be friends with one another
Some of you may look at this and think that that’s common sense, but for many people who have been influenced by the media and what have become societal norms, the “friends group” is something we long for. I used to long for this type of friendship, but something in me changed in the beginning of 2015. I became comfortable with the fact that I am what ties my friends together and that’s it. They’ll be at big events and it’s possible that one or two of them will be more than acquaintances with one another, but we will never have a “best friends” photo shoot, nor will we have thousands of group photos to share with the world and this year, I learned that that’s okay.
2. Holding on to things for time’s sake can be detrimental
Often times I want to remain in things because they are familiar, even when all signs point to moving on. Whether that is a friendship, and organization, a job or even an ideology, sometimes the only way to resolve issues that arise is to leave. I understand the desire to fight for what you love, but I hold a firm belief that you can find what you love anywhere if you allow yourself to love it. I can do my exact job somewhere else and learn to love it for different reasons if I am open to it. I am not saying that nothing is special and we can just hop from friend to friend and job to job and find all of the same meaning, but I am saying that if something is constantly causing problems in our lives, we don’t have to stay solely because we don’t believe we will find joy or fulfillment elsewhere.
3. Achievement and wholeness are not indicative of one another
I feel like some of my friends and I always talk in our group message about every year being “our year”, and 2015 seems like the year it was true. One auditioned for a certain organization and got it, another got promoted at her job, another joined a sorority, another got accepted into an academic program, another got a really good internship and then there was me. I became Homecoming Queen, I did 21 Days of Love again, I got accepted into a Fellowship program, I became a MACUHO VIP; I got an academic scholarship, I lived in the Bahamas for a month and so forth. So many amazing things happened this year and in October I started to realize how little it all meant. None of those wonderful things healed me or made me whole and none of them have the power to. Even the things my friends achieved are not enough to speak to their souls and cause wholeness to come forth; those are just material and worldly things. Unfortunately, we have become far less relational and we have so many tools to show off the good clips of our lives, that we actually forget that people can be popping on Instagram and Facebook and falling apart inside. I couldn’t forget this year though, not when it was me.
4. I have so much opportunity for growth (read: I am a mess)
From my spiritual life to physical health to mental health to work ethic to attitude and relationship habits, I am excited at all of the ways I can grow. It’s not that I am a terrible person (well if you’re talking about how we are all naturally sinful than yeah I am) but I’m saying that at first glance or surface relationship, we would probably get along. What I have learned this year is that there are some very stubborn weeds in my life and it is my duty to uproot them now that I know. The change and newness that I see for this year excite me. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and I am royalty, but that doesn't mean I don't have things to work on. Some parts of me are nasty, self-serving and undisciplined and I intent on working hard to fix those.
5. I don’t have to have a plan for everything
When I left my two jobs at the end of the semester and moved back home to commute to school, many people looked at me like I was crazy. Why would I leave living 10 minutes from classes in a free room and getting free food and? I would leave because it was not adding to my life in any way. When I left, the only thing I knew was that I would go home. I didn’t have a room at home because a family friend is staying with us. I no longer had a job so I wouldn’t be able to pay for transportation to school (still don’t). However, I had (and still have) an overwhelming assurance that this semester would be amazing. I was excited for it regardless of there being no plan in place. The first day I commuted, someone from my hometown offered to drive me to school every single day. A few days after that, while my mom was getting our basement refinished, I asked her if I could have it as my room. Although there was a small bout of whining from my sister, she obliged. This brings me to point number 6 that I learned.
6. Favor is REAL.
I don’t have much to say about this point because there is no magic potion or formula, it just is. God was beasting all year and up until this very moment, He continues to favor me. Know Him.
I could go on but that was a lot so I will just stop here. Thank you for all of your encouragement this year, it means more to me than you know that you guys actually read what I write. I will surely see you next year, probably a lot more than I saw you this year now since I am jobless J
Have a blessed and safe New Years Eve celebration!