Letting Go of Self Doubt
Let’s face it. Self-doubt is extremely detrimental to many aspects of your life; it may lie dormant for a while, but when it’s time for you to make a move, self-doubt is there to choke you. Or at least…that is how it happens for me. I am a dreamer, and I can plan and brainstorm with the best of them, but when it comes to execution, I frequently find that I don’t trust in my own abilities. A few months ago, my self-doubt was manifested in something so basic that I was disgusted and realized I needed to get to the bottom of it. Though this phenomenon can be found in different areas of our lives, I want to specifically discuss self-doubt when it comes to your talents and gifts and any innate skills that relate to your purpose and/or future.
I AM a communicator. (Btw check out the I AM movement; it is about self-empowerment when chasing your dreams). I am a communicator and I will no longer let anyone take that from me. I have had one too many interactions wherein people have used snide remarks about my communication skills that began to dismantle my beliefs in myself, and that stops here. There will be people who don’t believe in you, and there will be people who don’t believe in where you are going, but YOU have to believe in you. I have to believe in me, and there are a few things that I have to acknowledge to do that.
1. The truth
The truth is that you are gifted. You are talented, you have skills and you were created to do something beautiful. You are capable and you are adequate and when you are doing what you were created to do, nothing can stop you. The truth is also that everyone won’t believe that. Some people will not forgive you for your past and will pray against your future; keep moving. People are entitled to their own opinions and when you KNOW you are doing what you are called to do, you cannot let it shake you.
2. The contradictory nature of everything
Who I am is also who I am not. Your strengths are your weaknesses. Everything exists as itself and its opposite. Just like hot grows cold and soft grows hard, loud grows quiet and energetic grows tired. Sometimes you will be on top of the world, and sometimes you will feel like you are being dragged through the mud at the bottom of someone’s shoe. Sometimes, the very things that get you to those high places are the things that will make your stay in those high places shorter. My abilities to speak and write (read: communicate) are what get me many of the opportunities I have; but my speaking and writing (read: talking) is also what hinders me sometimes.
My friend’s father died, and he was a huge proponent of education. She’s a brilliant woman and an amazing scholar, and although the legacy of her father is part of her intrinsic motivation, this same thing is very painful and saddening for her to think about. Everything exists as itself and its opposite.
3. Your purpose is larger than you
It is great that we all have purpose, and that we were all created to do different things to form a cohesive community, but it is far bigger than us as individuals. Aside from crippling you, the reason that self-doubt is so detrimental is because it is preventing you from doing the work that is meant to impact everyone else. Whether you are meant to be a nurse, a journalist, an entrepreneur or a bus driver, when you allow self doubt to creep into your head, you hold up the process. Understanding the truth of who you are and realizing the dialectical nature thereof, are beginning steps to ensuring you don’t get in the way of those waiting for you.
4. Sometimes we know in pieces
You may not know all of what your purpose is right now, and this is perfectly okay. However, you must start working on the parts that you do know, that is what will help everything else be uncovered and make sense. There was a point where I could tell you what my purpose was for next year with a strong assurance, but if you asked me anything beyond that, I was winging it. I figured that because God was seemingly blessing the work that I was doing, when that work was over I had no idea what i'd do. That actually is how God works though. I cannot tell you what my life plan is for the next twenty years, because I have no idea what will happen in the next 20 years. What I do know, is that if the work I do in the next 20 years is submitted to the ways of God, then that is my purpose for those 20 years. Now, I know what I am supposed to do for the next year, and for years after that. I know that I am supposed to submit myself and my work to the ways of God so that I can remain in His will. I know because I started working; submit yourself and get to work.
That’s all I have. Yes it will be hard. No you can’t give up. All of those things are true, but it is a cycle, and mastery of points one and two will keep the cycle in motion.
If you know the truth and the nature of all things, you have a 100% understanding of why you should keep moving forward. Let us master those and work the pieces of our purpose so we can benefit the rest of the world.